There should be a law protecting you from elder sisters

They say I look just like my elder sister
and that gives me nightmares!

 
Hi!

I am Christine and I'm 11 years and 4 months old. That indeed makes me responsible for my own actions but despite this I am going to publish this letter.

I love my parents but that shouldn't mean that I have to love my elder sister. I hate my sister! She is just too much. And people say I look just like her! That is unfair an gives me nightmares.

I hereby declines all relationships to my sister and urge all people in position of power to make a law that forbids the existens of elder sisters!

Hoping for a better future,
Yours Christine

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The biker version of The Emperor's New Clothes

The biker version of The Emperor's New Clothes

What is your worst nightmare?

MIKE:  As a kid I heard the story about the emperor who ordered new clothes and was scammed with no clothes at all. Stupid people cannot see your new beautiful clothes, said the scammers.

No one wants to acknowledge themselves as stupid so when the naked emperor passed, everybody said: Wow, look how beautiful clothes the emperor is wearing!

But he was naked!

And that is my every night nightmare since I was 7 and heard that story for the first time. I see myself walking around in the nude as the stupid emperor did.

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How to survive on a desert island

Alice has a good understanding for what's important in life

If you could take only 3 items onto an island with you, what would they be? 

ALICE: I would bring a book, my nail file and at last but not least, a lover.

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There are different ways to wear an animal fur

Marion dressed up with some of her dogs

What is your favorite dog?

MARION:  My favorite dog is a Maltese. I like small dogs. They should be so small that I can hide them in my clothes. At home in my house, I have ten little dogs and right now I have five or six of them on me, right here, hidden in my clothes.

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That's an early bird by force

Cecilia is hard asleep every morning
when her cuckoo clock alarms

Are you a night owl or an early bird?

CECILIA: I've got five alarm clocks running with five minutes delay. The first one goes off at 6 o’clock in the morning.
The last one goes of when I am sitting in my car driving to job, just to make sure I don’t fall asleep on the road.

No, I’m not an early bird by habit but by force.

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She starts a new diet three times a day

Joe-Ann is yo-yo dieting per day

Are you planning to start a diet?

JOE-ANN: Oh yes! It is my normal state. To constantly be on a new diet.

Every time I finished a good meal, I start a new diet, and I stick to it until I get hungry next time.

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A Picasso for a chameleon

The chameleon Chubby is close to bursting in front of a Picasso

How do you train your pet?

MARY-BETH:   Some people train their pets to obedience. I don't. I want my chameleon to develop his talents, and his best talent is his sense for colors.

Therefore I take Chubby to various art museums and let him study the colors from the best of the best artists. Chubby favors Rubens, the old artists have dusky and easily imitated color scales. Modern artists with plenty of contrasting colors in their pictures are difficult for Chubby.
 A Picasso gives Chubby a nervous breakdown.

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Napoleon is his nickname

Napoleon or Mathias?

If you could be one person from history who would it be?

MATHIAS:  Ever since I was a little boy, I've looked like Napoleon. When we read about Napoleon in school my classmates discovered that I looked like Napoleon and I was immediately called Napoleon. As usual when you get a nickname you first get annoyed but pretty soon you get used to it and accept it.

Nowadays I feel a strong sense of community with the old Napoleon and sometimes I wonder if I'm not a reincarnation of him.

The real one

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A jumping night mare

Cindy, why are you trying to jump?

What is your worst night mare?

CINDY: I have a dream that constantly recurs: I'm standing high on a cliff and prepare myself to do a backwards jump like that from a trampoline.

Then I wake up terrified and soaking with sweat.

I do not know what the dream means, and I do not want to know.
My boyfriend says it is because I'm afraid of losing him!

I will never make that jump so there certainly is no reason to find out what it is about.

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Thinking just confuses me

Albert in his thinking pose

Beef, Chicken, or Pork?

ALBERT:  I wouldn't know about that, it takes me some time to figure out.

My wife always says: Albert! Don’t think, you’ll just get confused

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